Incontinent at Age 22, Matt Tells His Story to Help Others
What would it be like to suddenly become incontinent at age 22? That’s what happened to Matt. We met on Instagram where he messaged that he wanted to reach out to others about younger people and incontinence.
“It’s hard to talk to people about wearing diapers at a young age,” Matt said. “It happened to me when I was 22. I’m 38 now, and for 16 years I have had to hide my condition. I’ve been called a freak, and ‘nasty’ because of it. I just want to let other young people know that they aren’t alone.”
We here at Egosan were impressed with Matt’s courage and asked him if he’d share his story with our readers.
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Matt: “At age 22 I was in a bad car accident that changed my life forever. My friends and I were driving the day of the super bowl to get another friend who lived in Connecticut. Although it had snowed two days prior, that morning was decent, so we decided to go, but then the temperature dropped late in the day freezing the water on the road. As we drove down a hill and around a sharp corner on the ice-covered road, we slid into the other lane head-on into another car, and from there into a bolder.
"I was in the middle seat with just a lap belt on. When we crashed my face hit the headrest of the passenger seat and smashed out teeth, my hip was dislocated, and my bladder popped.
"Doctors were able to set my hip, but they told me that nothing could be done about my bladder. I then looked down and noticed that they had me in a giant adult diaper. I remember crying a lot at the news and feeling childish for doing that, but there was nothing I could do about my reaction, either.
"My parents came, and they were told everything. My mom was supportive, but my stepdad was mean saying stuff like, “Oh, so he's a baby and can't hold nothing. I’m not buying him diapers.”
"At first, when friends came to visit me, I was so embarrassed that I wouldn't let them in. After I went home, I let them come over, but I always made sure that the diapers were covered so that no one could see them.
"Eventually, I was able to start doing normal things again, but I stayed away from crowds where people could bump into me because people might see or feel the diapers.
"I had lost my girlfriend at the time of the crash because she didn't want to have to deal with me needing to change or being caught with supplies in her car. It was the same story with each new girlfriend. I even lost other friends because they didn't believe me that the car accident had done that and would call me a freak for having diapers on, so they also stopped hanging.
"I did have a few friends that didn't even care about the diapers which felt great, though, and one of them is now my wife of nine years."
Egosan: Matt, we’re sorry that you’ve been through so much.
"We know that there’s a stigma around incontinence with older people, which we are working hard to dispel through education, but for younger people, it’s got to be so much harder. Did you try any options other than diaper style pads?
Matt: I tried doing the catheters for a while, but I kept getting urinary tract infections (UTIs) and caused damage to my urethra."
Egosan: Tell us how you are doing now, Matt.
Matt: "I just want people to know that diapers aren't just for babies or the elderly. There are accidents and diseases, and other traumas in life that can cause people to lose bladder and/or bowel control and it doesn’t need to be the end of the world.
"I now have an amazingly supportive group of friends who couldn't care less about my need for diapers. They say I'm still me and no one judges me anymore. If someone else says something negative, these friends stick up for me before I can even get a word out.
"This support feels so good that it’s made me want to go public about my health problem and the stigma that people who have incontinence live with. Then Egosan caught my eye on Instagram as a company that cares about its customers, so I thought that this was a good way to get my story told. They were happy to listen to my story and help me share it.
"It would be great to hear from others who, like me, have gone through so much pain over what is really pretty manageable now with the right products"
Egosan: How is your health otherwise, Matt?
Matt: "I did well for a long time, but a while back I started noticing that I couldn't stop my hand from shaking at times. Also, I started having nerve pain in my stomach, and then sometimes I’d have bowel movements without knowing it. After some tests, my doctor diagnosed me with Parkinson’s disease. He said that even without the accident, I would still have ended up in diapers. So, there’s no question that I’ll need great protection for the rest of my life.
"If it weren’t for companies like Egosan I would be stuck in a bind, especially with the pandemic going on and money being tight. They reached out and are helping in this hard time.
"You have helped me more than you know. My life is doing good now that there are people and companies that really care."
Egosan: Thank you for being so forthright, Matt. I know that your courage will help others.
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I’ve been incotinate for almost 20 years, at the age of 49 years old, I had a fall off a ladder about 25 feet up on to a concrete floor, and I ended up with pelvic floor and nerve damage. In the beginning I had some control over my bladder control, but after 5 or 6 years I started having les and les control. After this I had to switch to wearing diapers 24/7. I’ve seen many doctors and urologist over the years, I have urge incotenAnce, at this time I have no control over my bladder and sometimes lose of my bowel control. I’ve been in diapers 24/7 for the last 14 years.
Carol Bradley Bursack
Casey Wortham thank you for your support of Matt. You’ll probably be interested in Bryan K’s story coming up on September 2nd, as well. If you ever want to share your story just let me know in Ask Carol at the bottom of the page or here in the comments. Diabetes affects so many people that hearing what you have to say would touch many. Thanks again for your comment.
Take care, Carol
I am happy that you have supportive friends now to help you. I am incontinent due to letting diabetes get out of control and causing neuropathy. I just can’t fathom that you were ridiculed for wearing diapers, that is low. I have some embarrassment sometimes, but am starting to own it more now. Good luck to you with your life’s journeys!
Carol B Bursack
Your story is a powerful one, Matt. We truly appreciate the courage that it took for you to share it with us and with others who could learn from you. Thank you.
nice article Carol!
Thank you again for helping with my story and hopefully others will come tell there stories as well it is a boost to my confidence and want people to just be ok with th selves
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July 08, 2022
Just a note to say that you’ve had a long journey of recovery after your fall. Incontinence is not an insignificant life challenge for anyone but it’s harder for younger people. I hope that you don’t have too much lingering pain after your fall but likely you are dealing with some effects. Thanks for your comment! Feel free to join our Incontinence Support Group on Facebook if you’d like.